silent tears...

Always wanted to talk about this..but never did..
Always wanted to complain 'bout this..but never did..
Always wanted to give a voice to these thoughts..But neva did...

Then why now?
After seeing this post by TEALThe fairer Sex, cudn't help breaking the silence..
It left me with burning rage,left me infuriated..
Such topics always Bring back al' those bad memories which wer pushed into the dungeon of darkness..
Bring back those memories of silent tears and burning helplessness...
Bring back the memories of dat night when al of us girls cuddled up in a room to share the worst times of their lives.
We were stunned to know dat all of us shared similar experiences..not even a single girl is spared..
jus becoz we don't talk 'bout it doesn't mean we've never been subjected to it. Truth is, we've simply chosen to shut up and grit our teeth.

You expect to confront harrassment everywhere...in crowded buses,in theatres,at office ,on roads,in public places and even at the place of refugee..yer own house!!
(shocked?? don't be)..
My first lesson ws delivered at my own place..My parents left to an other city and asked one of mah cousins to accompany us(bro nd me) dat night...If strangers touching you is bad, then what is worse is when someone you know, someone your family trusts, gropes you..What ws he looking for?Dammit! i ws jus 12 years old..I was shocked to death!! Kept crying on my pillow till the dawn.. ws shivering and shaking the whole night..silently saying "mom come back home".
Got up eyes swollen nd completely frightened..Could only tell my 14 yr ol'brother to send him away ..How could i have explained to him what i have gone through, dat night..I can recall the tears and more importantly how i shaked non-stop for a while.
why didn't my mom ever tell me that it was wrong even for my cousins to touch me.
U don't even know what to tell your mother about your cousin and stay quiet. Why? I guess I was too ashamed....now in retrospect, I see I wasn't the one who had to be ashamed but its too late to scream or shout!!..

Should I talk about the time when mah frend was felt up first by her sister's father-in-law?Or 'bout the time wen an other friend of mine was walking on the road and suddenly this auto driver flashes his dirty crotch nd grabs her?
Or even worst tel u about the 8th standard boy whu flashes his organ nd asks my frend to taste it!!Fuck guys!! give us a break!!
There were these and many more vague incidents of flashing, being leched at, commented on...and having strange hands feeling me up in crowded buses.Endless grunts, endless stern looks at those bastards and endless fears.God alone save the species called women frm those demonic perverts!!

You can't always swear nd shake thez creeps off...u can't always walk with clenched fists...u can't always try defending yerself from thez slithering reptiles..

It took me many many days to trust Men again.Not dat i trust evryone now but have some special ppl in life..But even today i shudder when a car slows down on a deserted road,even now i shudder wen some stranger smiles at me.
And i refuse to belive dat all male bloggers are not involved in street harassment
HATE AL THOSE MEN whu shame us into burning helplessness..I don't want to be protected by a man. No man needs to feel responsible for me. I don't want to be left out just cos am someone's daughter,sister or wife.I don't want al thez restrictions on us because of u guys..I don't want to miss the fun of taking strolls at any hour of night.

The day wen a teenage girl can walk on the roads without clamping the folder in her hand to her chest to avoid dirty looks then i say India can celebrate FREEDOM.
and yea it took me some courage to write tis and NO, am not asking for yer sympathy!!

Comments

XmPt said…
never knew that you have gone thru that. Never expected it either. i thought those were some isolated incidents.

but it isnt just india. happens everywhere. i cant say anything about it right now. too stunned to say anything actually
XmPt said…
and i admire ur courage to come out with it
Kk said…
Thats a real brave post ., and what u wrote is the pathetic truth that exists in the society 2day ., no Denying that. The sick thing is that these guys think they're real men 4 doing that. Those dirty stinkin rotten pieces of monkey crap will die a rotting terrible death and they deserve more than that no matter who it is.
U are not gonna get my sympathy., u don need it., but u deff gettin my respect 4 writin down this post.
I'm ur true fan now. That came 4m all honesty.
Teal™ said…
Yo gal... kudos to u ... it takes a lot of courage to get those demons out of the closet. And sadly yes, every gal has been felt up, molested and god knws wat all and wat not. y dnt these fuckers jus leave us alone!!!!
Even a trainin in martial arts or any kind of physical act of defense is in vain , as god made us women inferior to men in on and only one aspect => Physical Strength.
Very moving post.
Vivekanand M said…
its taken an hour for me 2 write sth out here..n in this hour,my emotions hve changed from numb 2 being angry abt this whole stuff..first off it was teal n now u..is tis a silent revolution tat v r witnessing??if so,u hve my full support..
Ramya !! said…
well there is only one thing I can say raa......... I'm proud to be your friend......
Ravi Kanth said…
For once, i really feel ashamed for being a Man.
That was really courageous of you.Very moving indeed.
Anonymous said…
Quite courageous of u to come out and say this...i really applaud ur work...
Anonymous said…
It is very difficult to come out with such stuff! I am thankfully blessed with a family..where in noone has ever tried to abuse me sexually,but I have been assaulted in the comfort of my own home by a bastard of a tuition tutor who tried to take advantage of me when I was like 14 and that bastard had a son my dadz age!!

Shame on the men... who treat women as objects of sex whether its in their own homes or just women on the streets....and its not just one girl's story.. lets face it..all females face an assault of this kind.. I have probably lost count now.. and not all men are like that..but the ones who are.. are too large a number! We talk about changing big things.. and this is a comparitively small thing to start with....How can a woman feel emancipated and independant when she knows there is someone..lurking in the shadows ..just waiting for a moment of weakness to attack!

--Aarti
Ramya !! said…
well, wanted to stop myself from saying this. But.......... konthamandi antaaru Gandhiji... artharatri.... adapilla ani.. But today the fact is artharatri kaadu.. pattapagalu... maga mahaanubhavulaku vandi pettataaniki sarukulu theesukosthunte... kannu kotti pakkaki rammanakapothe... alanti vaallani emi cheyyalo theleeka.. thelisinaa emi cheyyaleka thaladinchuku veluthunna vaallani cheyyi laagi pakkaki eedchuku vellaka pothe chalu babu... swatantryam vachhesinatte... that will be a day for complete celebration... frustration lo koncham ekkuva maatladi unte.... i am absolutely NOT sorry.
Unknown said…
orai! aa post raasaavu. naaku link post chesaavu. is that a disguised call for a change in our rapport? or can we still be 'the male chauvinist bastard' and 'the feminist bitch' between us, like we always were?

jokes apart, i hate talking about depressing topics, especially when those discussions have to culminate in cliched statements of helplessness. hence, i have nothing at all to say.

let the world keep throwing its worst things at you. you can still be the adorable girl that you are.
Anonymous said…
Hey Ron,
Wanna ask you a doubt. Hmmm, well once ...like 2 years ago me and my friend decided that we would speak to a girl, well a strange girl, whom we don't know. I mean we would just meet at a place(met in habsiguda) and any passerby gal who would be there, we would walk up to her and just introduce herself to her and talk to her. Well this idea came up because we wanted to prove to each other we could do it and we wouldn't at all be nervous. And I was of the opinion there's nothing wrong in talking and introducing yourself.

What's your take on this?
(Rest of the story of how I danced with that strange girl i met on the road within 3 weeks won't be told). :P

But what do you think of that incident?? Was I wrong? Cos I am still confused :d

Some girl answer me......
Anonymous said…
ron i really admire your courage to write it up!!
every girl is or has been asaulted once/twice .. needless to mention even i was asaulted (many times).
Anonymous said…
one thing i would like to add...it happenz not with every girl...itz wid every "child"
mydh said…
If you are a gal and walk on the road with your head facing the ground.. you'll have a million assholes walking through you. Next time you see a guy comin at you look him straight in the eye and he'll be scared as shit. And yeah child abuse is something that happens at some level to almost every child. So if you have a little sister OR brother, keep them aware of this.

@ rohini - Talking it out is the best way to put these demons out if not completely, yet partially. And hell we need sympathy! Those bastards also gotto know that those nuts can hurt real bad when kicked. A post completely worth a read! Peace.
Anonymous said…
@pavan,

its my opinion...it happened wid me and one of my friend(we r boys btw)
Anonymous said…
@pavan,

i dont think i mentioned "india"...its world dude we r talking abt
freak-y said…
now listening to all this i wonder, how the hell are we surviving as a society!
abhimir said…
don't have anything new to add to the things already been said....
jus wanted to applaud u 4 the courageous post....
i can't say nything more.... ur post has left me speechless... i always felt this phenomenon as a distant reality.... but reading dis post just hit me hard...
ARK said…
no sympathies sister, only respect. more than the courage you mustered to write this post, i bow to you for the courage you have in you for standing up to the world on your own. no girl needs a man to protect her or stand by her if she has the courage and will.
jitesh said…
What to say!! I just had an opposite
post(though a lot more lighter).. today when freaky recommended me 2 read this post..It was an eye-opener..
still its not all that rosy on the other side..
jitesh said…
I just had a much lighter but opposite
post..when freaky recommended me 2 read this post.. and yes its an eye opener..things are not all that rosy on other side...
Krishh Raem said…
Kudos Girl....

Kudos to ur bravery...

Never ever thought , tht world is filled of inane aliens fillied with th devious crave for female flesh..........

I admit tht i regretted being a Male for a momment
Pooja said…
It just doesn't end anywhere for girls.

Even before I understood how the two sexes work, I had already had an exposure to male pshyche while coming to and from school on the little bicycle. Sick men would follow the girl(s) mercilessly using words they'd never have had to hear, offering money and what-not while the girl is crying visibly. I am not talking about grown up girls - I am talking about class 7th/8th/9th! No doubt girls get mature early. They HAVE TO. And it isn't me alone, everyone of my friends has gone through this, has cried innumerous times and has kept mum cuz she didnt know what to say.

I came here from forgetful functor's blog, and I have to say that I cannot but pity those of my friends who insist guys see worse part of the world. They aren't even aware what it is that their sisters have gone through, what it is that makes their girl-friends think twice before going alone with any of their friends alone, what it is that she wudn't budge and insist on being dropped home. Guys, the world is far from friendly (not to talk abt SAFE) and the girls know that part better than you do or ever will.
Anonymous said…
Ronnie.. Lets understand this first.. Every person in this world will have dark side.. It just the weak moment of some one getting his dark intentions with you because you both are alone at the time. I remember a telugu dialogue from a bapu movie.. 'Avakasam ranantha varaku chedda vaadu kuda manchi vaadu ga vuntaadu. Avakasam vacchinappudu manchivaadu kuda chedda vaadu avutaadu'

Any way, i am not supporting him.. But, you can not combine all the guys and say 'fuck guys'. It happens with guyz.. It happened with me too (BTW i am male). A nieghbour sister (I call her as siter) seduced me when i was just 10 by putting my hand at some place. Another fucker (a women) tried some thing when i am alone and reading for std X exams. Luckily nothing happened at that time. I know how such incident could impact you for your life time and next few days. There are lot of silent stories around my friends (all of them are guys!!!) too.. I can not even explain them here. However, i am not saying 'fuck girls' or 'fuck women' or 'give us break'.. You need to understand that it not only happens with gals but also boys..

But gals stories comes out because when they speak about them instantly they can get sympathy. People will appreciate gal bravery to come out about such incident and can write or speak bapu dailogues about independence or some thing else.

wat about boys.. If we say such things, people will laugh.. or i dont know what kind of response we get because we never heard of them.

Lot of people already written lot of cinema dialogues here. Lets understand dark side of sex. It happens.. Lets control our hate towards opposite sex because of one single dark incident. Its just a weak moment for those people. They are normal people after that.. Lets leave the poor souls.. Lets try for better world by keeping moral values inside us.

Still I am not as brave as yours.. So, i am keeping my identity as a secret here.
Anonymous said…
Ronnie.. Lets understand this first.. Every person in this world will have dark side.. It just the weak moment of some one getting his dark intentions with you because you both are alone at the time. I remember a telugu dialogue from a bapu movie.. 'Avakasam ranantha varaku chedda vaadu kuda manchi vaadu ga vuntaadu. Avakasam vacchinappudu manchivaadu kuda chedda vaadu avutaadu'

Any way, i am not supporting him.. But, you can not combine all the guys and say 'fuck guys'. It happens even for the guyz.. It happened with me too (BTW i am male). A nieghbour sister (I call her as siter) seduced me when i was just 10 by putting my hand at some place. Another fucker (a women) tried some thing when i am alone and reading for std X exams. Luckily nothing happened at that time. I know how such incident could impact you for your life time and next few days. There are lot of silent stories around my friends (all of them are guys!!!) too.. I can not even explain them here. However, i am not saying 'fuck girls' or 'fuck women' or 'give us break'.. You need to understand that it not only happens with gals but also boys..

But gals stories comes out because when they speak about them, instantly they can get sympathy. People will appreciate gal bravery to come out about such incident and can write or speak bapu dailogues about independence or some thing else.

wat about boys.. If we say such things, people will laugh.. or i dont know what kind of response we get because we never heard of them.

Lot of people already written lot of cinema dialogues here. Lets understand dark side of sex. It happens.. Lets control our hate towards opposite sex because of one single dark incident. Its just a weak moment for those people. They are normal people after that.. Lets leave the poor souls.. Lets try for better world by keeping moral values inside us.

Still I am not as brave as yours.. So, i am keeping my identity as a secret here.

Popular posts from this blog

True Love??!!

Terror in our lives.